The Sleep Whisperer

So yours truly is finally done and dusted with Bachelorhood Redux. Over the weekend Beckett and Missus and FIL and MIL and yours truly made the not so long (but torturous nonetheless) journey from Baroda to Mumbai. So I have now gone from being a fly by night helicopter Dad to being a full time father. This transition is tough for everyone involved; Missus - because she will miss the sheer comfort and indulgence of getting pampered by her parents; Me - because Beckett just gobbles up time and attention and mind space like a black hole and leaves little room for anything else; Nani - because she will have to have to go back to Baroda after 3 weeks.

But the person who is most distraught about this is FIL. For all practical purposes, he has been Beckett's father for the last 4 odd months. He has done everything, from taking Beckett out for morning walks, to having extremely mature conversations with her, to helping with Nappy changing, to holding, rocking, whispering in her ears tirelessly till she finally fell asleep, to the dirty job of administering the vaccines. Thrice everyday, both Missus and Beckett looked forward to to him coming back from the dispensary to give them a welcome break from each other. And on his part, he was very happy to help them out and regale in living his childhood as well as fatherhood days once again. He has played his role with such dedication and devotion, that as a father I feel that this will be a tough and almost impossible act to follow.

As the day of departure from Baroda neared, all of us started coming to terms with reality and the inevitable separation that grandfather and granddaughter will have to experience. Given that Beckett has literally taken over his life since her arrival in June, the empty and silent house that FIL will return to will definitely feel like a box of presents that was filled with amazing experiences and bliss but is now empty leaving behind only fond wistful memories. 

It is a macabre thought, but i can't help comparing this whole change to the process of dying. The whole journey of life is so wondrous and joyful, that embarking on the next stage - not knowing what lies beyond, just fills everyone with such grief and sadness. 

I'm extremely lucky and proud and incredibly grateful to have such in laws, and FIL in particular. To me he will always be my daughter's first father and her Sleep Whisperer.