Tuesday, 20 July 2021


Finch arrived early morning on July 7th. 

While Missus was in the most painful throes of labor, all yours truly was thinking about was the date 7/7/21, and going all - 'She's going to be such a powerful sorceress when she grows up!'

7 is the most powerful number in the universe. 7 days, 7 notes, 7 colors in the rainbow, 7 heavens, 7 underworlds, and so on. And this one had a triple dose of 7s in her birthdate.

Missus, who was being an absolute champ, did not appreciate my resorting to Harry Potter voodoo as a mechanism to cope with the long and complicated labor. 

I could not be more grateful to the incredible doctors of the Golden Gate group and the wonderful nurses at CPMC Van Ness for holding us closely through Finch's birth and immediate care thereafter.

While the last couple of weeks have been intense & sleep-deprived, they've easily been the most rewarding period of my life in a long time.

Finch has been pretty kind to us, and Beckett has been an amazing elder sister. I don't find myself triaging as much between Finch and Beckett. Partly because Beckett has naturally gravitated towards prioritizing Finch over herself most of the time, and partly because her grandparents are here and taking care of her.

I also feel incredibly grateful that my work & work place allows me the luxury of taking this time off.

That said, it has not been all rainbows & butterflies. Emotions, and stress - both mental & physical,  run high after child birth. Living with in-laws, who can be especially unkind to me, have not made matters easier. 

On the brighter side, given that sleep is now always punctuated with disturbances, I've started lucid dreaming. My dreams are lit as F*** and now I remember them as well. 

In short, Finch has given me kindness, the most fulfilling fortnight in a long long time, a break from work after 7 long years, and literally my dreams.

Being Beckett's & Finch's father is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known.  

Saturday, 10 July 2021


Conflict is one significant thing you experience when you become a parent to more than one child.

For many, it is not obvious; sometimes it is a blindspot; sometimes there isn't a conflict because the choice seems blindingly obvious. 

But once there is more than one child in the melee, you are constantly triaging. 

My current conflict is whether to write about Beckett's 6th birthday and the lessons she taught me 3 weekends ago or whether to write about Finch's dramatic arrival and how she's going to be an insanely powerful sorceress.

While it seems obvious that Finch's arrival is a much bigger occasion than Beckett's birthday - (Beckett has been teaching me lessons for the past 6 years, whereas Finch's arrival is a one-time event) I feel conflicted about which one to write about first.

I'm a big believer in embracing conflict. Actually, I'm a big believer in embracing everything that comes my way; both serendipities & zemblanities. And this is a beautiful one that I feel incredibly blessed to be experiencing. 

So here I am, embracing it, and writing about conflict.

Here's to many such wonderful, delicious ones that my brain will manufacture in the future.    


Sunday, 27 June 2021

Dear Finch

Dear Finch,

I must confess that your name did not jump at me the way Beckett's did. I played around in my mind with Stark, Everdeen, Granger, Francon, and Taggart. 

Beckett already named you Kaju Noe, and that is not in line with my taxonomical construct. So it took some more effort to find you a name. 

But when it came to me, it was very easy. 

I must also confess that I've not been as enamored or swept up with your approaching arrival as I was with Beckett's. 

But I promise that when you do arrive, I will make up for it in paternal skill & sincerity.  I'm a much better father now than I was six years ago when we welcomed Beckett.

Still wedded to silliness, quixotically optimistic, and whimsical in mostly good ways. But also simpler & minus unnecessary drama.

I cannot wait to meet you in person. 

And so can't Beckett. She's both excited and nervous, and I can promise you that she will be the best thing to happen to you. 

Saturday, 29 May 2021

Letters to Beckett - 3

Dear Beckett,

There are few things I pray for.

I pray that you find your voice. As early as you can. And keep it with you. Always.

I pray that you write your song. In your words. In your meter.

I pray that you sing it. With your heart. Loud, soft, and silently - in your head. And I pray it sings back to you.

I pray that you play with your notes. Find new ones, change few words, miss a few of them, let them meander.

I pray that Music always finds you. By design. Serendipitously. And everything in between.  

Sunday, 7 February 2021

Player 4


Player 4 has entered the fray.  

Code Name: Kaju Noe.

Excited, Nervous, Scared, Much Wow!

More updates later.

Sunday, 23 August 2020

Beckett Learns to Bike

That's the post. That's it.

She learned how to ride a bicycle this week. Wednesday, August 19th, 2020, to be precise. Pappa is a very proud father.

I couldn't do diddly squat when I was 5. I didn't have a bicycle either. She's had one for a couple of years now.

Tuesday, 11 August 2020

The Petal

Presenting Beckett's first original story, The Petal.

Goes from Interesting --> Fun --> Spooky --> WTF